Mothering Sunday

It’s Mothering Sunday in the United Kingdom today. Mothering Sunday has been celebrated in much of Europe on the Fourth Sunday of Lent since the sixteenth century. Its origins may date as far back to a pagan celebration of the Roman mother goddess, Cybele. The first Mothering Sunday commemorations were more about visiting the church you were baptised in (your “mother church”) than celebrating mothers, but in later years this was the one day each year when boys and girls in service were allowed to go home to visit their mothers. (Imagine, only being allowed one day off a year, and one visit home!) More and more in the UK, this holiday is becoming more secular and is often referred to as Mother’s Day, just as it is in North America and other parts of the world.

There are a lot of people in the UK who feel that people in North America “hijacked’ Mother’s Day by celebrating it in May, and by celebrating the holiday largely as a secular thing. Actually nothing could be further from the truth. Unless you live in a very southern part of North America, March is hardly the time for celebrating this kind of holiday as the weather has the potential to be pretty awful. We often had snow in March when I was a kid in Canada and this makes travel difficult and dangerous. May, on the other hand, is when Spring is usually pretty much in full swing, a much nicer time of the year to get together and celebrate moms.




Today in my part of England, the sun is shining, spring flowers are bursting through and the flower pots on my patio are in full and glorious bloom. I know for a fact that while it may be sunny, it won’t be like that in Canada or much of the US today. So it is definitely not a case of hijack, rather much more one of practicality! Instead of arguing over the details of this celebration, or trying to claim it for our own, let’s spare a thought for those for whom this day is a hard one - those who have lost children, those who wanted children but could never have them, and those who miss their mothers, whether because of death or distance.

Since the death of my own mom, I find both Mothering Sunday and Mother’s Day very bittersweet. On the one hand I have the most wonderful family, with a marvellous husband and son who are making today really lovely for me. I’ve had some beautiful cards, flowers and some rather scrumptious chocolates plus I’m looking forward to being taken out for dinner this evening. On the other, just like so many other people, I miss some amazing women who were a huge part of my life. For me, these include my Aunt Irene, my Aunt Trish, my wonderful Jenny and of course most of all my own fantastic Mom. I am forever grateful to all these women for how they helped to shape the woman I am today, and for the wonderful, wonderful memories I have of them.

Whatever you call today - or if today is just an ordinary day and Mother’s Day falls in May for you - I hope that it is a happy family day for you and that you are surrounded by those you love doing the things you enjoy the most.

Mothering Sunday

I love Mothering Sunday. My family make me feel valued nearly every day, but there is something special about having an actual day to celebrate Mothers. We always go to church first thing which I love, especially the bit where the children pass out the daffodil bouquets to all the ladies in the church. It is good doing that, whether people are mothers or not. You never know whether someone perhaps just wanted desperately to be a mother and was never able to, or if someone has lost a child. How painful it would be to be left out. I remember the Mothering Sunday before my son was born, we went to a special restaurant with our dear friends Barbara and Noel Wild (who are also my cousins, but that is another story!). Anyway, both Barbara and I were given lovely plants - even though I protested I was not a mother. The waiter insisted that I might be one day - and it was not long after that I fell pregnant with my son!

Of course Mothering Sunday has always seemed different for me coming as I do from Canada. Even though I have been here nearly twenty years, I still think of Mother's Day as being in May. I feel strangely piqued when people in England insist that having a Mother's Day is somehow incorrect. First of all they never mention the fact that North American Mother's Day is in May, not March. I do not even know if many of them realise that and it takes great restraint for me not to mention it. Does it really matter when or how mothers are celebrated, provided that they are indeed celebrated? The English tradition is indeed a beautiful one, stemming as it does from the old tradition of attending your Mother Church (the first church you attended, or the church your church was planted from) the fourth Sunday in Lent. However as most folks in North America were immigrants, attending their Mother Church was clearly not an option! So Mother's Day in May grew out of what many may have remembered from their homeland but were simply unable to do. Yes, it has become commercial, but to be fair Mothering Sunday is just as commercial here. I also fail to understand the upset caused by calling Mothering Sunday Mother's Day. Both are on a Sunday - is it really such a worry? As for me, I always almost forget Mothering Sunday, and then am pleasantly surprised by it, falling as it usually does just after our Wedding Anniversary. Just when I think the celebrations are over, they begin again. G and A always make it such a lovely day for me.

I was given a beautiful bouquet of flowers on Saturday night, and then Sunday morning I had two gorgeous cards. A addressed his envelope "To a Beautiful and Talented Mother". I was so touched. A also gave me chocolates and G had found a beautiful handbag holder. This was made all the more special by the fact we had seen a lady using one in Paris the weekend before (I had never seen one before) and G had managed to procure one in less than a week! It was lovely not to have to put my Louis Vuitton handbag on the floor when we went out for dinner in the evening . The holder simply hooks over the edge of the table and will hold up to thirty pounds in weight. Well, even I don't fill my handbags that full! The holder itself is gold with a beautiful crystal embedded in the top, so it looks pretty as it holds the handbag on the edge of the table.

We had a fabulous meal at The Spread Eagle in Rolleston-on-Dove, a pub we have gone to for well over ten years and that always feels like home to us. After all our gourmet meals in Paris last weekend, pub grub was very appealing in homely kind of way. Having said that, it was hardly pub grub - I had a beautiful fillet steak with sauted potatoes and delicious vegetables in a light sauce. We came home and sat by the fire in the lounge, drinking coffee and brandy and eating the chocolates A had bought for me. It was quite idyllic and I felt very blessed. What a brilliant day!